Monday, June 30, 2008

67 days later.......

It was a good 67 days give or take a few.

Thursday, June 26th Tom had a Dr appt and came by the office to discuss a new camera with me.  He was all excited about getting a "good deal".  The "good deal" turned out to be that my Mom was offering to pay for 1/2 of a new camera.

So we looked over a few and I selected some to compare later. 

Once he got home and delivered Miss T's lunch to her (she was with Roomie) he took off for some lunch of his own. 

And had a glass of wine with the best friend's wife which lead to a stop at the liquor store for a couple of mini bottles.

I called him in the middle of the afternoon and noticed a "change" in his voice.....light and excited.  I asked if there was anything he'd like to "confess" or "tell me" and of course the answer was NO.

We discussed money a bit because there was an issue in the bank account and he says "by the way, you'll be getting a delivery of flowers this afternoon for our Anniversary".

I said thank you, then without much thought said, "Why today?  Esp since we're leaving on Fri and not coming back till late Sunday?  Why not wait till Monday?"

Seemed logical to me.  But he said Monday would have been one day too late and he'd be in the dog house.  So he figured this was a good thing.  It was.

Then I called him back about 5 after I left work.  He asked if I received a delivery and I said "yes, thank you that was sweet" and he said "good I'm glad I did something nice" for a change in the same old light, funny voice and I just let him talk.  Finally I asked again and he admitted to "a glass of wine".

Once I got home he became obnoxious. 

Told me I was ungrateful  --  (because I made the comment about getting the flowers when we were going out of town).

Asked me "where would you be without me?"  (yes, I'm rolling my eyes)

Then he started in on HIS money (which he said he would never do again) and words began to exchange.  He went back in the bedroom to lay down.

He really hurt my feelings.

And then low and behold my home filled up -- with people.  Miss T's friend and her mom showed up, so the girls got in the pool; the Mom and I sat on the deck.  She knew I was ill.  Tom came outside, roomie came outside, roomie's new beau showed up.  Then my Mom, StepDad and Nanny.

Did someone call the army too?

Funny how several people could "smell" the situation. 

Interesting that it didn't take long for them to leave either.   Except Roomie's new beau.  We all got in the pool and left grumpy frumpy to his misery.  I believe I could have slept in that pool all night.

The one good thing about this (and only one)??

The roomie's new beau is a recovering alky and said that seeing Tom this way just emphasized why he became and will remain sober.

So SALUTE TO TOM for keeping one man on the straight path.



robinngabster said...

Damn that man needs a kick in the ass!  

garnett109 said...

I'll drink to that, so sorry but I had too.

grofsand said...

While reading this I coulddn't help but hearing the song "Masquerade"

Are we really happy here
With this lonely game we play
Looking for words to say?
But not finding understanding anyway
We're lost in a mas--masquerade

Both afraid to say
We're just too far away
From being close together from the start
We tried to talk it over
But the words got in the way
We're lost inside this lonely game we play.

...Life is hard enough dealing with the people we know, nevermind the 3 personalities that exist below and the 5 Masks that worn to cover it.

I wish you great strength in dealing with this, and hope a happier tune plays on in your heart!.

Flowers are elegance that Nature allows us to see, they may given to us with a variety of ulterior motives, but it should never dimish the flowers beauty!

The same can be said for us!
Peace...Marc :)

imgr8phil said...

Your husband is making his choices and he is choosing to not care about anyone, not even himself.  He hasn't learned his lesson at all.  You need to figure out your future before you end up not having one because he may choose to detroy your whole family if left to do his drinking.  I pray for you Sharon.  You and Miss T take care.


hugsdoodlewacky said...

((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGSTOYOU))))))))))))))))))))))I was hoping Tom was getting better.I am praying things will work out for the good.

deshelestraci said...

I'm sorry it didn't last longer.  Sounds like a bunch of fun.

chat2missie said...

I'm so sorry Sharon!

sunnybethe said...

Good thing you got away from the situtation for a couple of days.  I just wish tom wouldn't do this to your family.  Sure was nice while it lasted though (?)  Love the photo of the sign : )  hugs,  Bethe

eml625 said...

I cannot believe he did this again. He really needs help. He has got to want this.
I pray for you, for you to have the strength to get through this.

queeniemart said...

If he screws up your birthday i am going to kick his ass. You are the best thing that will have ever happened to that man.
I love you

newsworthy822 said...

Maybe hanging out with roomie's friend will be good for Tom and something will rub off on him.  Let me know if you need me to come down there and host an intervention for you.  I'm serious.
HUGS & prayers to you and the family

whoopiepoopsie said...

I spent 32 miserable years of my life married to an alcoholic.  I feel for you more than words can say.  In my case, I wish I had had the courage to leave him and take my two children and start fresh - I often wonder how different my life might have been if I had done that.  Instead, I hung in there until his health was gone and I was all he had.  He died at the age of 54.  Alcohol had taken everything away from him - his confidence, his self esteem, his health and most importantly the respect from his family - but to the very end he resisted doing the one thing that could have saved him: letting the booze go.

Hugs from Minnesota

cacklinrosie101 said...

Aw, Sharon, you know that I know exactly what you feel and are going through.  The words of alcohol ain't pretty.  Hang in there and take a few floats around the pool for me.  Our weather is sucking.  Love ya, Chris

jckfrstross said...

hope you have a good week:) praying for tom he just doesn't get it also praying for you and miss T


lifes2odd said...

Sharon, you have got to get out of this mess! I know you love him , that's obvious with what you put up with but you have given him chance after chance to get his shit together. All I can say is do what you feel is right in your heart. I'll be here to listen and support you in any way I can no matter what your decision. But how long can you keep living like this?!! Hugs to you my friend, Martha