Friday, May 11, 2007

Extreme Redneck

Being a redneck type myself (although refined) I get a chuckle out of these......some are close to home for real!
Enjoy.....I needed a laugh!!
You're An EXTREME Redneck When...

  1. You let your 14-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.

  2. The Blue Book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas is in it.

  3. You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.

  4. You think a woman who is "out of your league" bowls on a different night.

  5. You wonder how service stations keep their rest-rooms so clean.

  6. Someone in your family died right after saying, "Hey, guys, watch this."

  7. You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.

  8. Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling

  9. Your junior prom offered day care.

  10. You think the last words of the "Star-Spangled
  Banner" are "Gentlemen, start your engines."

  11. You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off its wheels.

  12. The Halloween Pumpkin on your porch has more teeth than your spouse.

  13. You have to go outside to get something from the fridge.

  14. One of your kids was born on a pool table.

  15. You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.

  16. You can't get married to your sweetheart because there's a stinkin' law against it.

  17. You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.

  18. And the winner is:
  An East Texas couple, both real-life rednecks, had nine children. They went to the doctor to see about getting the husband "fixed". The doctor asked them why, after nine children would they choose to do this. The husband replied that they had heard recently that one out of every ten children being born in North America was Mexican and they didn't want a Mexican baby because neither of them could speak Spanish.


madcobug said...

Cute ones. LOL. Helen

eml625 said...

Ok- THAT was funny!


deshelestraci said...

Oh thanks for the laugh!  I really needed it!

hugsdoodlewacky said...

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGSTOYOU)))))))))))))))Theeses are reallly funny.Have a nice weekend.

queenb8261 said...

Good ones!!

luddie343 said...

I always wondered about this word, redneck.  lol but these go far beyond any stuffy definition, I like your sense of the absurd.  Odd, you look so sensible!  xoxo CATHY  

bookncoffee said...

I knew I wasn't a red neck when I read #1.  LOL.
Hope you have a good week.

deshelestraci said...

Happy Mother's Day!