Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Love SICK!

This won't win me any nice awards that's for sure.

I am SICK!  Sick of seeing and hearing all around me about LOVE.

My "love" is crashing around me.

I don't have any "love" to celebrate other than my wonderful daughter.

I am hating the whole Valentine's theme.

I am hating the man I married more and more, yet .........

As I do love him, I cannot tolerate his current lifestyle.

Lies

Drugs

Alcohol

Total disregard for ME and our family.

It is 3am.....30 mins ago a tow truck drove in with my truck on its bed.  Another sliced front tire.  Tire #2 this week.  These are brand new tires that I bought just 2 weeks prior to Christmas.

That truck will sit like that till the COWS COME HOME!

Tonight I attempted to have him stopped by the cops, only he didn't come home like he said he was from a bar.

Had they stopped him, the truck would have been impounded; Tom would face 5 years in jail for being a repeat offender.  Truck would have been sold at an auction to the highest bidder (it's paid for thankfully).

But as roomie said 'tis better for him to have turned to crack-town rather than to have run into your ambush and lose the truck'.

Damn she's right ya know........but.

He's been wanting to go to TX to see his brother, the one who can "help me figure this out".  Only I'm not so sure the brother wants him there in this state of mind.

He's really pathetic.

One day I'm going to read these entries and ask myself why I waited so long.

Love this graphic Jill made just for me!!!

21 comments:

katerh99 said...

Some day you will read that very last sentence and have the time and energy to appreciate the answer. Right now, I get the impression you are exausted, from running like a gerbil on an exercise wheel.

hugsdoodlewacky said...

(((((((((((((((HUGSTOYOU))))))))))))))))))I am sorry you are going through so much heart ache and you dont deserve any of this.I know you love Him.I hope and pray things work out.I am glad you have your daughter,he needs you and you need Her.Just know that I care.

garnett109 said...

sorry to hear this friend

eml625 said...

I was afraid to read this. I can't believe he's at it again, or still I should say.
I sure hope your ok, I know how difficult this is. I'm here for you. I mean it, anytime you want to talk.
hugs,
Ellen

ukgal36 said...

Do you watch the show Intervention?
that's what he needs..
God help ya hunny..i can't even imagine..
Lyn

deshelestraci said...

Yes, you are.
Love, Traci

robinngabster said...

Time for some tough love.  Kick him out, change the locks and let go.  Can you do that?  Do you need his income to survive?  I feel for you...hang in there.

mpnaz58 said...

You have a choice.  You can't fix him, make it ok for him.  You can only fix yourself, and make it ok for you and Miss T.  You continuing to be in his downward spiral is a choice too.  You and your daughter deserve so much more!  Take care...
xoxo ~Myra

xxroxymamaxx said...

Poor sharon honey bunny!!  I got your back.  Love ya!!

peytonswater said...

Roomie is right, although it something I would have done to.  Yes, you will read this someday and ask why you waited. What does Miss T think? Let her be your rock. I love ya girl
And you know what? I despise Valentines day. Only thing now is I do something nice for the boys!
Hugs
Ang

springangel235 said...

Sending you hugs and many prayers, you deserve better.
Joyce

queeniemart said...

i love you and understand. His luck will run out very soon and maybe he is only going to change when he hits rock bottom.
Love you so

lj

buggieboo1 said...

I'm sorry! Thinking of you!


~~~Make it a Great Day~~~
          Sharon
http://journals.aol.com/buggieboo1/ImASurvivor/

jillannemarie said...

I'm sorry hun!  I hate that you and Miss T have to go through all this.  I wish I could make it better.
I'm glad you like the graphic.
Jill Marie

jckfrstross said...

i am so sorry :( maybe you could pack his bags and kick his butt to the curb praying for you

Deb

lifes2odd said...

I'm so sorry Sharon. You know you and Miss T are in my thoughts and prayers. (((BIG HUGS))) Martha

imgr8phil said...

Along with many here, I will support you no matter what.  I know it is difficult to be in the situation you are in.  One of these days something really bad is going to happen and someone is going to get hurt or killed by him driving drunk.  If that happens you could lose a lot more than a truck.  Get you and your daughter into a better situation and do it soon.  Take care.

Phil

cuteallison1980 said...

I feel so badly for you. : (  I don't like seeing anyone suffer and it is obvious you are suffering.  You deserve so much better than you have it right now.  You have the strength to do what is right for you.  Don't be afraid.  You have an inner strength that can get you through all of this, just don't let this go on for too much longer.  You and Miss T are the most important things right now.  I wish I could do something to make you feel better.  If you ever need someone to talk to I am here.  IM me anytime.  

Allison

chat2missie said...

I really feel bad for you and Miss T.  There is nothing I can say to make you feel better or even make the situation better.  Just know I'm here with lots of hugs for you!!
Missie

ktkamanski said...

I am sorry your having to deal with this kind of disfunction. You deserve to be treated with love and kindness. I hope this resolves it's self soon without any more pain. Take care of you and yours,
Katie

rgossett4195 said...

When I was married the first time he used to come home everyday drunk or not and call me names.  My answer was to turn to alcohol myself.  I nearly killed myself from this horrible character flaw, some call a disease, whatever I finally got help & divorced him.  Now nearly 20 years later I can look back and say it was a blessing, BUT I had to go through everything that I went through to be the person I am now.  Sober, remarried, happy and well able to function in this world.  You are wise to set boundaries with him.  Hang in there, but keep yourself and your daughter safe, and keep setting limits until you can decided what is best for you and your child.  rose~